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Monday, August 27, 2012

QueryCon #10--Golden Dawn

Title: Golden Dawn
Genre: Paranormal
Name: Aldrea Alien



Dear Guest Judges,

Herald, eldest son of a bloodthirsty strigoi, endured two centuries of hell before escaping into the human world. He watched, helpless, as his twin brother was murdered by the very villagers his father insists on raiding. Though he has reservations about his father's human-only diet, Herald has nevertheless devoted all of his 1100 years towards protecting his family from outsiders.

Bewildered by his orders to guard the giant crystal held within the castle, Herald doesn’t expect it to hold the spirit of an angel. She is his father's failed attempt to gain true immortality. One he cannot be rid of. Breaking the crystal would free her, but the uncontained magic would level their sheltered valley. Herald's deranged sister doesn't care. She'd rather risk destruction than let the angel influence another sibling.

When the angel's continued existence becomes more important to Herald than his siblings, it results in that sister's death and his banishment. But the angel has taken mortal form in preparation to leave this world and her immortal-gifting blood is free for the taking. Now Herald must decide whether his true loyalty lies with his family or his heart. Either choice will demand death. Only the right path will ensure the life taken is not his.

GOLDEN DAWN, complete at 33,000 words and the first in a trilogy of novellas, is a Paranormal with romantic elements, loosely set in the 1500’s.

Thank you for your time and consideration.

Sincerely,
Suzanne Thomas (Writing as Aldrea Alien)

3 comments:

Krystal Wade said...

This sounds like it would make a great serial for CQ.

Nancy M Bell said...

I like it and would ask to see the full manuscript. However, I suggest tightening your query. My suggestions are below.

Herald, eldest son of a bloodthirsty strigoi, endured two centuries of hell before escaping into the human world. His twin brother was murdered by the very villagers his father insists on raiding. Herald has devoted 1100 years towards protecting his family from outsiders, though he does have reservations about his sire's human-only diet.

Bewildered by his orders to guard the giant crystal held within the castle, Herald doesn’t expect it to hold the spirit of an angel. She is the result of his father's failed attempt to gain true immortality. Breaking the crystal would free her, but the uncontained magic would level their sheltered valley.

When the angel's continued existence becomes more important to Herald than his siblings, it results in dire consequences.Now Herald must decide whether his true loyalty lies with his family or his heart. Either choice will demand death. Only the right path will ensure the life taken is not his.

GOLDEN DAWN, complete at 33,000 words and the first in a trilogy of novellas, is a Paranormal with romantic elements, loosely set in the 1500’s.

Amy Lichtenhan said...

Great job. You caught my attention on "endured two centuries of hell..." If we published novellas, I would definitely request the full manuscript.