Pop Travel

 Genre: Scifi Thriller

Scene setup, Cooper is at a library looking for info regarding "The Creator's" plantation to see if he can find a better way in. The FBI have been watching him and have sent agent Geri Harper to get close and see what he knows or if he has evidence.

As Cooper immersed himself in historic plantation legend, unsure of what he would find, a woman walked by his table and stopped to look over his shoulder at his book.

“Excuse me. But is that ‘Grand Ol’ Southern Plantations?’ I b’lieve my great, great, great, great grandaddy’s ancestral home is in that book,” she said with a thick drawl.

Cooper frowned and kept his head down. He didn’t want to acknowledge her so he covered his eyes with his hand like he was blocking a glare and scooted his chair away from her. “Oh,” he replied, hoping his body language would give her a hint to go away.

“Hee-ya, let me show you,” she said and reached over to turn the pages. “May I?” she asked. How could he say no? This lady was very pushy, making Cooper more uncomfortable with every minute in her presence. But she did smell nice.

He glanced up at her. She had nice, wavy, auburn hair, too. He shrugged and scooted his chair out. The sooner he let her show him, the sooner she would be on her way.

Oct 24 -

For Want of a Piglet

Hard fantasy (what does that mean? Hard fantasy?)

Snow still fell when Ilya shook me awake in the middle of the night. The patter of flakes on the overhead tarp blended with anxious whispers and sharp coughs. A pony puffed nearby and hooves shifted on the tarp.

“Ulf says stay close,” Ilya whispered in my ear. “Get the bedroll off and flat so nobody trips. Careful of Acorn, he’s right here.”

I blinked and rubbed at my eyes and a whiskery horse nose nudged my cheek. Acorn shifted away as I struggled out of my bedroll and to my feet. I put my arm over his neck for balance as I kicked the heavy blanket further off and tried to spread it flat. Puck snorted, close by too.

The fire was just outside our tarp lean-to, low and largely glowing coals. Ulf and Sir Kiefan stood on the far side with their backs to it, one with bow and nocked arrow, the other with sword in hand. Kiefan asked something of the woodsman and he muttered a reply. (is this necessary? If it is, maybe tell us what's being said, if not, I might cut it.) Beyond them, the black forest waited, crusted with a layer of snow glowing blue in the trace moonlight. Tumbling flakes kept up a quiet patter as we all fell silent, even the ponies. Really like the imagery.

Adrenaline was fast driving off any lethargy of being woken, but there was nothing to see in the clusters of squat pine trees and thickets. Ulf and Kiefan moved a few steps apart, tense and alert. I wanted to ask what was wrong.

Lantern eyes lit up beyond the fire, tracking by, and vanished. A shape moved past a snow-laden pine branch. That coughing sound again, from the shape, and it was answered from behind me.

Ilya, holding Acorn’s bridle beside me, whispered, “Mother Love, we’re surrounded.” Loved that!

Like this!

Faerie Wings

YA/New Adult Fantasy

Lead in: Ryanne (Ry) has just slipped into a private wedding. A magical compulsion of sorts is drawing her into her destiny. She just doesn't know it yet.
Question for you: What should I call the guy. Man sounds too old. He looks to be a couple years older than Ry, who just graduated from high school. Still looking for that YA/new adult voice. :)

The private paradise mesmerized Ry. For the first time in her life, she was surrounded by a beauty so perfect, it made her ache inside. She walked slow but couldn’t look at everything fast enough. The invisible force continued to pull her toward the center of the garden. Ry turned and walked backwards in an effort to get one more look at some tall spear flowers. And backed right into a pair of strong arms.

"Oh!” she yelped as those arms spun her around.

"Sorry about that. Didn’t have time to warn you.” The man whispered.

Time stopped.

Brown eyes with gold flecks looked deep into her soul. She breathed in his cologne, something close to reeds and rushing water with an underlying musk scent. In that one moment between blink and breath, Ry’s restlessness disappeared and she was home. 

"Are you lost Ma Cherie?" His slightly accented voice was warm and full of humor. 

I like this, but I'd like it even more if I saw a little more of the man/guy/dude who has captured her attention. Not a lot, mind, just a little, like show us how he looks to her eyes (college age? dark hair? Light? Is he smiling?) and I might consider putting this line  "In that one moment between blink and breath, Ry’s restlessness disappeared and she was home." (which I love) after he asks if she's lost and after she's shown us (the reader) how he looks.

Of Wishes Made

YA Contemporary Fantasy

Laughter caused him to frown but it wasn’t enough to make him open his eyes. Footsteps passed with a crinkle of shopping bags and banter. He inhaled and absorbed their life force as they passed like harvesting a single dewdrop from a field of wildflowers.  And in response, they swerved, unaware of the rattlesnake in their midst. He remained immobile, confident no one would touch him…If they're unaware why did they swerve? Or are they subconsciously aware?

He lurched as a body collided with him and would have fallen but for the cool fingers that gripped his forearm.

“Sorry,” said a female voice. “I didn’t see you, like, standing there. Mesmerized by JC Penney are we?”

He stared at the young, dark-haired woman who had barreled into him. Her narrowed eyes were benign at first then a flurry of emotions chased across her face, difficult to read. Fear? Concern? But the flash of determination that bloomed and stayed was simple to interpret. Her mouth firmed into a hard line.

The hand that steadied him tightened then released, slid down and brushed the back of his hand.

He waited for her reaction. It was not what he expected. What exactly did he expect, I wonder.

She lifted one shoulder when he remained silent and regarded him with eyes the color of burnt flowers. The teal collar of her shirt gaped, showing a fine gold chain that rested in the hollow of her throat, her respiration a counterpoint to the pulse at her neck.  Her lowered brow gave way to a shrug then she turned away and joined an older woman. A slim boy with pale blond hair stood by her, slack-hipped and curious.

The Lullaby

Genre: YA contemporary fantasy

A hand came down on her shoulder. She whipped around, her hand raised, ready to strike this new attacker, but she stopped short. The green-eyed boy smiled at her, a small smile of mischief. (Like that.) He was playing hero. His face turned cold, though, as he looked over her shoulder. She turned her head to see.

Redstone was standing with his hand pressed to his face. (If this is the first time we see Redstone I'd like to get a better picture of him.) When he moved it, Cassie saw a long scratch down his cheek where her nail had scratched him. His eyes burned straight into hers, “Get out! Don’t you dare ever come back, you little bitch!”

The boy led her out, keeping a tight hold on her arm. She glanced back, just in time to see Redstone slamming the door. It melted into the wall, as if it was never there, and what had just happened, hadn’t.

He started laughing about a block away from Redstone’s. Cassie stared as he let go of her arm to double over, his hands on his knees. “Did you…” he choked off, his sides heaving as he tried to regain his breath. “Did you see his face when you pushed him away?” He looked up at her, grinning.

Cassie gave him a dubious look but she could feel her own grin spreading across her face, “He did look a little funny.”

“A little? His eyes blew up as big as street lights and his face turned as red as a stop sign!” He had to stop talking as another fit of laughter ripped through his chest.

She couldn’t help it, she started giggling and she couldn’t stop. They stood together, the boy bent over and Cassie leaning on the nearest building, both of them laughing uncontrollably. People on the street gave them strange looks, some shaking their heads. The thought that they were all probably thinking the two of them were high crossed her mind. She started laughing harder. Interesting!

the first time

Well, here we are again and I'm looking for another round of submissions. This week lets look at the first time we, the reader, meet your main character's love interest OR antagonist. Let's keep it to around 250-300 words. Send your offerings to: marcy@tidewater.net and please put unicorn bell in the subject line.

Here is an excerpt from my novel Grimoire, when Lord Wyndham first meets Miss Devlin: 

     “Miss Devlin,” Adrian said politely, noting how still she sat and the way she watched him, her gaze frank and appraising. Her eyes were an interesting shade; just now they looked more blue but a moment ago he thought they might’ve been green. Her nose was straight and her lips generous. Her hair was an interesting tawny shade, streaked with gold and pale red lights and she might have been pretty, he supposed, if not for the freckles that spattered her nose. They made her look silly, he decided, focusing his attention on Grace again, wondering what sort of game she was playing. Because if there was one thing for certain Grace never did anything without a reason and this girl wasn’t here because Grace wanted company.