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Monday, January 25, 2016

Winning Query Letter / Our Little Secret by Ashelyn Drake

For the time being I am postponing my Dear Writer posts to do a new feature. I noticed that there are many query critiques here on Unicorn Bell and thought a great addition would be to share winning query letters from published authors. My hope is that sharing these great queries will help and inspire writers out there who are struggling with query writing.

Today’s winning query letter is from Kelly Hashway under her pen name Ashelyn Drake.

Kelly had been previously agented but found herself needing new representation, a task as daunting as having to find your first agent. I love that her query letter is the first for this feature as it gives us more examples for writers in every stage and situation. 

Query Letter:

Dear [agent]:

When my agent left the business, leaving me in need of representation once again, the first name that popped into my head was yours. I've followed your blog for years and commented numerous times about how your wealth of knowledge astounds me. I can't think of another agent I'd want to represent me more. While I know contemporary isn't your favorite genre, it is what I'm querying with now. I do, however, have a young adult fantasy and a young adult paranormal, each in different stages of revision. So as you can see, I plan to keep writing all three genres in the future. 

My young adult contemporary romance, Our Little Secret, is complete at 63,000 words and is written under my pen name, Ashelyn Drake. The manuscript is currently being considered by an agent who requested the full, but I didn’t want to miss the opportunity to query you.

Toby Michaels is the guy every girl at Lansfield High wants, including seventeen-year-old Becca Daniels. There’s just one problem: Toby is Tori’s twin brother. Tori, as in Becca’s best friend. And Tori is sick of girls falling all over her brother. So how does Becca tell Tori that she has feelings for Toby?

When Becca catches Toby sneaking glances at her and sending her late night texts, Becca can’t ignore her feelings any longer. Life becomes one big complication having to sneak around behind Tori’s back. And when her relationship with Toby threatens to destroy more than just her friendship with Tori, Becca will have to figure out what she’s willing to risk to keep the guy of her dreams.

I am the author of the Touch of Death series through Spencer Hill Press. My upcoming titles include The Monster Within, which is releasing in 2014 through Spencer Hill Press, and Into the Fire, which publishes in 2014 through Month9Books. I have also released one novella series, Campus Crush, under my pen name.

As per your submission guidelines, I've pasted my synopsis and first five pages below. Thank you for your time, and I look forward to hearing from you.

Kelly Hashway/Ashelyn Drake

Thank you for sharing your query letter with us, Kelly!


Bish Denham said...

This is a great feature, Chrys!

Kelly Hashway said...

Thanks for letting me share my query.

Chrys Fey said...

Thank you, Bish! Glad you think so.

Chrys Fey said...

Thank YOU for letting ME share your query. :D