tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4393512822627120580.post9080899323979468341..comments2023-08-01T05:26:06.539-05:00Comments on Unicorn Bell: Action crit #2: be specific!Huntresshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08155372788872245758noreply@blogger.comBlogger2125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4393512822627120580.post-89289192775766105042013-03-27T08:19:49.638-05:002013-03-27T08:19:49.638-05:00I agreed with all of L's comments. This sounds...I agreed with all of L's comments. This sounds like it could get really interesting once we know more of the dynamics of the people and situation. And we clearly see who is in the game and why. <br /><br />This excerpt made me curious about the story line though. :)Charity Bradfordhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01960821077619680661noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4393512822627120580.post-9305032214714807942013-03-26T16:15:44.231-05:002013-03-26T16:15:44.231-05:00Wow, I didn't realise I'd used 'the ma...Wow, I didn't realise I'd used 'the man' so many times. Could probably change a few to 'hunter', providing I give Herald a reason to suspect this is so ... hmm ...<br /><br />And the shiny object is never mentioned in name. Before this, Herald only suspects the guy is hiding a weapon in the paragraphs before this.Aldrea Alienhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05652344290376563676noreply@blogger.com