Wednesday, January 30, 2013

Hook #8

I sat packed into the back of a hummer with a bunch of Army guys. The convoy I’d joined currently headed to a compound where a local school was located. The air inside the cab was stale and charged with a nervous energy.
at

2 comments:

  1. mshatchJanuary 30, 2013 at 9:30 AM

    To me a hook hints at what the story will be about and unfortunately this doesn't do it for me.

    ReplyDelete
  2. HuntressJanuary 30, 2013 at 10:18 AM

    The action doesn't start until the third sentence. Lots of 'tell' in the rest of it.

    ReplyDelete

Your turn.

Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.